Stardate, oh wait, that’s pajama boy talk.
Thanks to the Duras sisters, we had a new version of the Genesis torpedo, designated NTD-1701, to test. It had been suggested that, in order to elimnate competition from our greatest nemesis, both in battle and surfing, we go back in time to the early 21 st Century on the Terran’s star.
There we were, preparing for a wild ride using that G2 main sequence star to generate a wave worthy of being called the Mother of all Kowabungas.
“Sue’La, is that new torpedo ready?” I asked my Executive Officer.
“Everything is set. Just give the wod,” she responded.
“Let her rip. Surf’s up!”
The torpedo launched, making it’s way towards the Terran star, our ship was in position to catch a super wave. The Genesis torpedo hit the star dead center and…nothing. No explosion, no wave. Nothing.
“Very strange. B’indi, analysis. What went wrong,” I demanded of my science officer.
“There seems to be a disturbance in the Force. Seems to be some temporal anomaly caused the NT-1701 to fail,” responded Commander B’indi from her science station. “There also seems to be some unusual activity on the Terran homeworld causing the anomaly.”
Odd. Time to investigate. “Okay, pin down the coordinates. I am beaming down. Sue’La, you have the bridge. Engage cloaking device after I beam down. B’indi, provide the coordinates to the transporter room”
Minutes later, I was on the Earth. I found myself standing in the middle of small park. In the middle of the park was a playground for Terran children. None were about. I checked my chronometer. It gave me the local time and date. June 27 th, 2025, a little after 1PM local time. Geographically I was in a town called Riverside in the ancient Terran State of Iowa. Something familiar about name, but I couldn’t quite pin it down. The star shone bright above me. And then I saw it. In the middle of the playground was a gold Star Fleet emblem as a decoration, laid upon the ground. “What the heck?” I was, of course, puzzled by this.
An old Terran ground transport roared by, and I looked up as it passed, and across the road the vehicle was on was a building. I was shocked by what I saw in front of the building. I miniature Federation starship, much like the Enterprise. It had blazoned on it U.S.S. Riverside. More questions cropped up as I crossed the steet and saw that the building had a sign on it that read “The Voyage Home Riverside Visitor Center”
I pulled out my communicator and called up my ship. “Sue’La, check the history files, specifically Riverside Iowa. Query, what is significant about this place?”
“Birthplace of Captain James ‘The Tiger’ Kirk, born in the year 2228,” came Sue’La’s response.
I signed off and began walking around the town. I only went a few blocks when I saw it. A monument proclaiming this town as the FUTURE birthplace of that Denebian Slime Devil, Captain Kirk. How was this possible. The obvious answer was that this is why there was a time anomaly. This place was a focal point for the future of the Terrans and the Federation. But why? I decided to go back to the building designated as a visitor center. My communicator began buzzing, demanding my attention.
“nuqneH!” I demanded.
“Kahuna,” it was Sue’La, my executive officer. “A Federation task force has just warped in.”
“Impossible!” I responded.
I could hear my science officer in the background chime in. B’indi said “It appears to be of a strange composition. Federation ships from different eras. There is even an Orion trader coming in. And, of all things, a Gorn Battlecruiser just turned up.”
At that point, I spotted them. Several Starfleet officers had appeared near the visitor. Looking aruond, I could see more of them showing up. Different uniforms, different eras. They were mostly Terrans, with a few Vulcans amongst them. Even a couple of Andorians. None of them were attempting to blend in, pointy ears visible. And then there was The Gorn. Not just any Gorn, but The Gorn. The one that Kirk fought. He appeared to be ready to party, instead of looking like he was ready to fight. ‘What’s next?’ I thought. ‘Metrons? Organians? And Tholians? Oh, my.’
One of the Feddies spotted me, pointed, and called out, “Hey look. A Klingon.” He sounded a bit surprised, but definitely non-hostile. Perhaps the way I was dressed had something to do wht his reaction; swim trunks and floral print shirt common amongst us wave riders. “Where’s the beer?” he asked of me.
One of his buddies interrupted, “Beer tent is at the big park. Common, let’s go get a couple of beers. Hey Klingon, are you here for TrekFest, How about having a beer with us?”
I figured, what the Stovokor. I called up the ship and advised Sue’La and B’indi to beam down and join me as it was looking like it was shaping up to be quite a party.
As it turns out, the NTD designation on this new Genesis torpedo stands for “Not Today, Dude”.
Kahuna out.
Editor’s Note
TrekFest in Riverside Iowa is a great event to attend and a must
for all Star Trek fans.
This year, at Trek Fest 40, the guests included Bobby Clark,
one of the two stuntmen in the Gorn rig fighting Captain Kirk,
as well as Conner Trineer and Dominic Keating of Enterprise.
For more info, checkout the website at trekfest.org
Sqotty